ok so this post has been a thought that has been on my mind for a while now...its something I would like to do but have no idea how to get from point A (in my head) to point B (out of my head) So I thought I would post it here and see if anyone had any ideas on how to make it happen.
Ok so here are my thoughts:
Modesty is something that is taught. Its something I had no concept of as a teenager and something I look back and wish I had a clue about what guys were thinking and WHY modesty is important.I know that as we look around immodesty is everywhere, but I have a hard time putting all the blame on the girl. I think that we as christians are called to be disciples and we are teach the younger women, so I think that we as followers of Christ have sorely missed the mark. I believe these girls are confused or niaeve about what guys think about when they look at scantily clad women. I think they may not know that its all that important today and if they do they may think that modesty is looking like one of the Little Women or Mary Poppins. They need to be taught these things. But have you seen some mothers today? they are not modeling modestly for thier daughters so maybe they need to be taught as well. How can a young girl look modest and fashionable at the same time? I am not sold on the whole idea that we should be wearing burkas and a turtle neck but at the same time I don't want to look like Brittney Spears either. I think that today girls are hit left and right with images in the media that are not realistic, and then they hear their parents and other "churchy" older people talk about modesty, and how "back in the day girls knew how to dress!" ok great but since I can't find a pair of bell bottoms or a hoop skirt anymore how does that apply to me. The two seem as if they will never meet.Yet everyday many of my wonderful godly women wake up and walk the modestly fashionable tightrope with ease.
Nonetheless, I have this burden on my heart for awkward, gangly teenage girls. Why? I have no idea... ok that's not true, I know God has put it on my heart, but for what purpose, I have no clue, because I still get it wrong some times. I wear things and then I get out in the "real world" aka Walmart, I look down and bam! the shirt I thought covered everything has now suddenly decided to shrink and become a tube top. Ah, Grace.... I am so glad that God extends it to me, A LOT.
Anyways back to the point. I have been thinking, and now I invite you to travel to Jessica World for just a moment, where time and money are your friend and children don't bother you every 5 seconds. I would have weekend girl event. there would be a talk on what the Bible says about modesty, different families perspectives on modesty, Godly men would come in and talk to the girls about the effects of immodesty on them and how they struggle with the visual. then it would culminate in a fashion show, where women (me) would go to local department stores, consignment shops, and thrift stores, and put together outfits for all types of girls, all types of weather and all age groups. that are all up to date fashionable, affordable and most importantly MODEST. We could also take pictures of some of women in the magazines and get clothing that is similar to theirs but that we have changed to make modest. We could do surprise makeovers on some of the attendees and give away outfits. and at the center of it all give the girls tools, practical tips and pointers on how to look your best (not sexy but nice) and not violate Gods Word.
Ok so that is my thought. Where it would be held, who would pay for it, who would come... Well that part hasn't fleshed its self out yet. Hence the trip to Jessica World. However I am convinced that God has put this on my heart and so I know that He will work it out. Maybe through someone reading this blog, or a friend of a friend or something. Who knows, but now it's out there for all of my readers (Bobby) to read.
Ok now for questions,
What are some rules about modesty at your house?
How can we activaly reach out to young girls and teach them like we are called by Scripture to do?
5 comments:
We have let Jewel know that the way girls often dress on TV is fine for them because they are acting and that isn't how they would normally dress. We explain to her that she cannot wear things that her father and I do not approve of. So that means no short shorts, no shirts that show her belly or are too low cut, which consequently doesn't bother her because she is the first one to say "I don't like that because it's too low in front." Thankfully I am a bit bigger tha the average woman nowadays, so I always dress with modesty because I don't want to be that person in the store that people are pointing at saying "Did she even look in the mirror when she left her house?"
Amy, that's good. I never thought about talking to them about the difference between acting and real life. I mean in the contet of clothing. we talk about how BumbleBee isn't real and all that but didn't think about the clothing aspect.
And dude, I totally feel ya with the whole "what the heck was she thinking?" I once ran to the store to grab more medicine, both kids were sick and had been for a while, I was out of clean clothes and hadn't had the time to shower in two days. I thought I didn't care; and I didn't until I ran into a lady and her husband from our church followed by an ex boyfriend. Yeay me!
Hey Jess. Nice Post. Thanks for talking about the male perspective. I think a lot of women just don't realize how aware men are of a woman's body and dressing immodestly is like putting on a blinking neon sign that say, "Look here!" Men aren't off the hook here. We need to set a watch over our hearts and eyes, but it certainly helps when a woman knows how to dress modestly so that she is not a potential stumbling block.
I love your fashion show idea. Having had 4 beautiful daughters (now all 20-something moms and wives) this was a struggle, especially in their teen years. When they really wanted to wear something I considered "sketchy" (or totally unacceptable), a favorite argument on their part was pointing out women in the church who dressed that way on Sunday morning. So maybe a fashion show for women first, hmmm?
Also, maybe rather than a one-shot fashion show event, planned by women for the girls, what about a series of get-together's of both women and girls, where:
- initially there is discussion about the concept of modesty, then maybe time spent looking through fashion mags, catalogues, etc (preferably led by someone with experience in fashion);
- then move on to going to the mall together and looking at, even trying out outfits;
- then getting someone with design skills to come in, and give some pointers on fashion design;
- then a time when the girls and women create (on paper; maybe even make fashion-doll outfits) potential outfits
- then go out together to the thrift stores (and even get items from the girls' own wardrobes);
- create the outfits as you have described;
- invite a person involved in modeling to give the girls some modeling pointers
- and then do the fashion show, for a larger audience, maybe even as a fundraiser for a charity or something, with the girls doing the modeling. The girls (and the women too) would really be taking ownership of the whole concept of modesty, I think; and would really come to feel that fashionable clothes can actually also be modest, inexpensive, creative, etc.
(hmm... maybe get some men and teen boys in at some point in the process, to put in their 2 cents. If they are brave enough...)
Oh, by the way, I would never pay for clothes my girls wanted that were immodest. That often ended the discussion right then. (At least until they were in their later teens and had personal income...)
LOL... I remember when I was in high school (late 60s early 70s) and mini-minis were, well, "groovy"! My mom insisted my skirts had to reach the middle of my knees. Halfway to school I would stop, roll up the waistline of the skirt, and then carry on to school (shirts with long shirt-tails were in style and covered the bunchy waistline, lol). My dad taught in the same school I went to, but he was totally oblivious to fashion, and never noticed. Hmmm... wonder what my girls managed to do when I wasn't looking? Oh dear!
Love your blog, by the way!
Norma, I love the ideas. Thank you! I have been toying with ideas that of how to get it from my head to reality. that seems to be the most difficult thing. I have an idea of pitching it to our Home school group president but first I want to finish planning the ladies retreat that I am elbow deep in right now and then we'll see.
Micah, I'm glad you liked the post. I might call you and ask you to be the male speaker...LOL
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